Quotes To Live By

"You can't depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus"

- Mark Twain

I Always Loved Lemons

I really do make up the rules as I go...

This morning I woke up and nothing felt right.  I only finagled 4 hours or so of sleep. I found out some unknown person had signed for some priority mail of mine.  And the reality of some recent changes in my life had really sunken in... But with all those lemons, I not only made lemonade, I added a little Ciroc and made a LemonDrop too!!  All I know, by early afternoon, I was getting dressed to head out for a day of shooting in NYC.

The homie King, does it again...

King had a late lunch date in the city and invited me to tag along for another KING and "Landscape Jay" exclusive.  We followed our normal routine where we park in front of this unused driveway that we've labeled, "King's VIP Spot" and hopped on the path to WTC.  Once in the city, we made our way to Battery Park, with cameras drawn and trigger finger itching.  Here's what I shot:


Kids Hard At Work...

 

I love their "job"... and mine =)

And just when I thought my lemonade glass was empty, a few friends invited me over to take a 9pm dip in the pool.  A late night swim and some great conversation was the last thing I imagined when I woke up this morning.  Alas (who says ALAS lol), we ended the night getting all pruny in the hot tub.... ok I'm lying, that water was so damn hot, we hopped out moments before the chicken was falling off the bone... (insider) lol =)

Tomorrow's menu: Lemon meringue pie and a box of Lemonheads!!

*Big shout out to KP for the power of inspiration.  Besos!*

Quotes To Live By

"He couldn't make a sentence stand out if he put Viagra in the ink"

- Some guy on Law & Order

The Baby Mama's Checklist

Firstly, I would like to point out that I have no kids! And not by accident, I intentionally have NO kids. And after doing a forecast of my near future, I see sunshine, a few clouds and still NO kids. And the sole reason I see NO kids is because I checked that finger in between my middle and my pinky fingers and noticed no bling bling, no sparkle, not even a twinkle. As corny as it may seem to you, I will not have kids until I am married and when you see me on The Tyra Show having triplets at 42, you can say, damn I knew that girl…

But instead of tripping on me for ignoring my biological clock with an expiring snooze button, let’s draw our attention to baby mamas. I would be remiss if I didn’t at least acknowledge the different categories of baby mamas. You have:
A) Mothers of children of men who have good paying jobs, who have their kids and this woman in his best interest or at least lives in the same living quarters.
B) Mothers who have children by one man and has found happiness with another man who she may have married, lives with or has a lasting relationship. And then there’s
C) Dumb @$$ baby mamas whose baby daddies ain’t ish, will never be ish and its no surprise because when she met him, he wasn’t ish!!
The focus here will be on Baby Mama - C.

Who the hell told you it was ok to let yourself be impregnated by a man with several kids, with no job, no car, no independent living situation, an electronic ankle bracelet, a wife, missing teeth, locked cornrows (you know the kind that look like it was braided 6 months ago and never touched again), this list is endless… which is why I have developed the baby mama checklist for all the potential baby mamas who insist on having babies for God only knows what reason. I will only list 5 basic criteria, but feel free to add to the list for the sake of not becoming the latest statistic

1. If you wanna beeeee with me, gotta have a J-O-B – yes love knows no boundaries, but babies know no broke. And since diapers cost money, formula ain’t cheap and healthcare is a necessity, you AND hunny dip should have a job. And no rinky-dink minimum wage job. $7.25 an hour may support his sneaker habit and maybe it satisfies your hair, nail and feet pampering… but it doesn’t hardly suffice when raising a hungry, pooping infant.

2. These boots were made for walking… and cars are made for driving – If you live in NYC, a car is a ridiculous burden to attain but just about anywhere else, a man should have a dependable vehicle. And not saying that good men need to have cars. But good men need to have cars. Simply because owning a vehicle supports the perception of independence. If you go into labor, will he have time to borrow his mother’s car while she’s all the way at BINGO?

3. Papa was a rolling stone, where he laid his hat was his home – ummm yeah, no… won’t work here. Backpacking in Europe should be the only time he calls multiple places home in such a short time period. If he doesn’t have a stable living situation, how can he have stability in supporting a family? And living with parents/family isn’t so bad when he’s taking care of someone sick or if his name is on the deed and people are actually freeloading off him. But if a pillow and blankets rest in the corner of the couch and he has to wait until his little cousin finishes watching Cartoon Network before he can go to “bed,” something ain’t right.

4. Maury: You are the father, you are the father, and you are the father of this one too – When a man has kids, plural, no wife and has never been married, this is a dead giveaway that you will ALSO not be a wife. I mean there’s a possibility he’ll wife you, its just not likely!! Tell hunny, jr, and jr jr that you’ll catch them on the flip side, turn around and JET.

5. Presentation is everything – another dead giveway, obvious even before the initial conversation, is a man’s appearance. My mom tells me I’m shallow for looking at a man’s footwear even before I look at his face. But a man’s appearance means he cares about how he looks which represents charisma, character, confidence and a whole bunch of other C words that may help you determine if this cat is a good catch!

And a bonus I’ll just throw in for free is: If a man already has a happy family and he’s looking for some one niter nookie or even a continuous flow, heighten your standards above side piece status. Why risk getting pregnant by someone else’s husband who will resent this kid and you? Don’t birth a baby into an outcast situation.

If you use this checklist as steadfast as the damn DMV with their 6 point rule, you are almost guaranteed to have the intent to find a suitable baby daddy… or what the hell, go for the gusto and build a real relationship, get married, live together and then have a baby… now we’re cooking with some grease!! EYEListen.

SB: What ever happened to condoms and contraceptives!?!?!  There's even the PLAN B!!
SB + SB: And if you do end up in a dead beat baby daddy situation, refrain from dragging his name through the dirt cuz ya choices are a reflection of you.... you can still be a good mother without kicking his back in.

Quotes To Live By

"Circumstances do not make a man, they reveal him"

- Dr. Wayne W. Dyer

You Never See it Coming, You Just Get to See it Go

Unless you're Oprah or Bill Gates (both of whom frequent my blog... In my head)...  most of the toughest decisions you will ever have to make will involve that magical emotion: LOVE.  Whether its love for a craft, a place, or that special someone, you will need to decide if its best if you stick with it or if you should let it go. Letting go is the most difficult of the two but if you delay it, it will only get tougher.

Last week I was laid off from my job. Hold the sympathy and the "it will be okays" because next to having my leg broken, that's the single most important thing that has happened to me on this road toward rediscovering/reinventing myself. Sounds weird, I know.  But when I broke my leg.... It slowed my busy @$$ down and let me smell roses that had been sitting beneath me for years.  Then once I had a plan in motion, I knew the next important step would be for me to quit my job.  Needless to say, God heard my cries and on the 4th day returning to work from disability, they laid my butt smooth off.  So now I can collect a li'l severance, go back to school and not be pressed looking for a job in the meantime.  A few people closest to me couldn't really understand my drive and they have found it hard to be happy for me and to them I say: I'm the winner see my prize. You're the loser who sits and cries. LOL.

Since last Thursday, I've gained a super hero strength!!  I felt like that move has sparked or better yet, has surged a power in me to decide what I need to stand clear of, what I need to separate myself from and what I need to keep the ball rolling with.  Not everyone or everything will make the cut. And it will be hard to say goodbye... But dammit, GOODBYE!  I'm no longer hanging on to relationships that are no good for me.  I'm no longer living in situations where I can't find longevity. I'm no longer LOOKING for anything!!  Have you ever driven down an unfamiliar road in search of a gas station, searching and searching when your not even sure if one will be found. Well I'm off that road!!  I'm on Route 22 (google it you people far, far away) and not only is there a dozen gas stations, there's restaurants, entertainment stores, a supermarket and every other pointless to absolute necessary business manufacturing your every desire!!

Don't get me wrong, I'm making it sound easy when I know moving on is a very tough decision to make.  But that's only because we ALL fear something new or starting over or taking risks.  No one wants to leave security, that all too familiar comfort zone, and what you've invested so much time in.  But keep it real, are you really enjoying it?  Not just happy... Because happy is circumstantial and has no longevity.  I'm taking about REAL joy. So even when you're mad or hurt or upset, you know that there's nowhere else in the world you would rather be.  Anyone or anything may be able to put a smile on your face, but who or what will keep that smile up there??  Ok this is getting cheesy lol. Bottom line, drop the excess in order to make progress (man that was smooth, and right off the top).

He never reads my blogs, but in case he sees this... Know that I love you with all my heart, now and forever more. Thank you for it all.

And for the one who does read it, don't cheat yourself. Have no regrets. Do what you love and love what you do. I'll miss ya!! Oh and keep that tat clean and moisturized daily =)


A liberating experience for the both of us... The value of love, peace and friendship...

"Sometimes people come into your life and you know right away that they are meant to be there; they serve some sort of purpose, teach you a lesson, or help you figure out who you are." 



SB: If a situation is looking like something you've done before and the outcome was no bueno, do yourself a favor and retreat. I did. And I feel like a wiser, stronger woman. Remember, fool me once...

EYE See Why You Love My Eyes

"Look me in my eyes... and I'll take your word"
How many times have you heard or even said these words before accepting or rejecting someone's word??  As if magically the truth will go spewing from their pupils revealing their deep, dark secrets. As if the connection of their eyes to yours forms an invisible lie detecting filter.  As if every convicted murderer breezed by the polygraph and the Bible but couldn't help breaking down at the glare of the prosecuting attorney.  But yet it's still so believable! The power of the eyes outweigh any other facial feature, bodily expression or unique flavor of personality.  It's like the binocular view to the soul...

I was driving to my train this morning ("my train" like I own it lol). And on the way I heard a commercial about preventing the eye disease glaucoma simply with regular eye exams and early detection. But what if you don't have regular exams at your disposal?  What if your idea of regular is the frequency of a lunar eclipse... What if you heard that commercial too late... This led me to imagine a world without vision (literally and figuratively). Shit!! Its one thing to be born blind and not missing something you never had. But to go blind after a life of love at first site, deja vu, witnessing miracles.... SHIT!!  Like a race horse who goes blind, somebody please put me to sleep!

The other nite I was catching up on some DVR'd ANTM... Ya life is void if you don't know this acronym. I'll  wait while you google it cuz I refuse to elaborate... Ready?? So yeah Tyra was teaching the girls about smiling with their eyes and how much it impacts their modeling. The energy, the story, the imagination behind emotionally fueled eyes is orgasmic.  The lustful surge between a man and woman, the unyielding trust between a mother and child, the magnetic force between a man and his PS3... Wow, I'm getting chills.

Ok ok I'm rambling but in the past few days the eyes have increasingly been on my mind (and on my face... I'm corny, shoot me lol). I was talking to a friend about getting a tat of the Eye of Providence from the dollar bill but its so deeply associated with free masonry, of which I'm not, so I abandoned the idea. Maybe I'll jus get the eye of willEYElisten. =)

Last but certainly not least, the Motivation for this Post Award goes to my buddy who sent me this pic:

Many would have deleted this self imposed off frame shot. But I think its perfect! Of course he was tryna get his sexy on with this lip shot. But I love it simpy because neither eye is revealed. The left eye is almost visible, showing just a beautiful eyelash or two. But the other eye is completely out of view giving this shot a deeper mystery. Sparking lust and desire to know where those eyes are and what's behind them. To find out the truth that will magically come spewing from his pupils...

I'm going to share a secret with you... I tried tilting the pic a little to see if I could manage the slightest peek at his eyes *BBM embarrased smiley*